Peter and Jesus on the water

Peter and Jesus on the water

Missionary, Pearls of Revelation

Peter asks to come out of the water!  Peter asks.  I was always under the impression that Jesus calls him out to the water, and then Peter responds.  (See what comes of reading the Word for yourself! See what comes when we slow down and meditate on the Word with the intention of feasting on it!)

“When the disciples saw Him walking on the sea, they were terrified, and said, ‘It is a ghost!’ and they cried out in fear.  But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, ‘Take courage, it is I; do not be afraid.’ Peter said to Him, ‘Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.’ And He said, ‘Come!’ And Peter got out of the boat, and walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But seeing the wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’ Immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and took hold of him, and said to him, ‘You of little faith, why did you doubt?’  When they got into the boat, the wind stopped.” (Matthew 14: 26-32, NASB)

Oh, how I have felt like Peter in these past few months!  I have cast out my own fleece to the Lord, saying “Lord, if You want me to be a missionary…Lord, if You want me to be in disaster relief…Lord, if You want me to be full-time in Your service…Lord, if You want me, if You have chosen me…” – all questions that I imagine most missionaries have dealt with at some point.  And I realize, like Peter, I asked to step into my missionary ministry, as a fleece to know that He is with me, that He walks alongside me.  And so He said, “Come!”…and so I did, and I got out of my metaphorical boat, gained my footing, and proceeded to walk in that ministry.

“But, seeing the wind…”  Wait.  It’s not the chaos of the water or the battering of the waves that makes Peter lose his footing?  It’s not his ability to walk where the natural deems an impossibility?  No.  It’s the wind.  Could the wind represent what we hear the world whisper in our ear of what is logical, or what is possible, or what is healthy, or what is reasonable – the doubts that it casts our way when we choose the path to be set apart as Peter desired.

“But, seeing the wind…” (NASB, NIV, ESV) – and varying translations add to this image:

  • “But, when he saw the strength of the wind…” – Berean bible study
  • “But, when he saw the wind boisterous…” – KJV
  • “And, when he saw the wind was violent…” – Aramaic Bible in plain English

Peter’s eyes focused on Jesus when he first got out of the boat because he “came toward Jesus”.  What happened? Peter’s gaze changed; his nautical bearings shifted so to speak.  He now focused on the force of the wind, wind that he thought would certainly knock him off balance…and so it did.  If Peter had only kept his eyes fixed on Jesus, surely he would not have been knocked down and battered by the waves himself.

Like Peter, I have lost my bearings at times throughout the process of transitioning to full-time ministry.  At times, my gaze is so fixed on Jesus, feeling secure even in the midst of chaos; at times, my gaze is distracted or dulled (lukewarm), and down I go.  Thankfully, Jesus’ loving hand is so quick to reach out, and His loving discipline reminds me of why I went down.  I hear Him saying, “Anchor your eyes on me, Katherine.  All things are possible with Me.  I will lead you to incredible places and experiences you dare not dream of yet.”

  • Again, and again, and each day until You come back Lord, I re-anchor myself in Your presence and declare that winds and waves cannot shake Your kingdom, Lord – that nothing robs me of the love, joy, and peace of God in my heart.  If I’m feeling unstable in my place, thank You Lord for helping me to surf and navigate the place where You have me.
Trapezing with the Lord

Trapezing with the Lord


Have you ever tried to trapeze?  To fly high in the air with the greatest of ease?

I had the opportunity back in 1991 to do some trapeze in Port St. Lucy, FL. It requires climbing up a small ladder, being harnessed up, climbing up an even tinier ladder, and standing on a 2×2 platform with a release person.  With a hook, the release person draws back the trapeze bar and tells you to grab hold with both hands; meanwhile, they have a hold of your harness from the back (or in some cases by the waist) – the only thing stopping you from dropping off the platform.

There’s this moment before you let go for the first time.  This moment when these thoughts run through your mind, like “AM I OUT OF MY MIND??”  or “Why am I doing this again?” or “If it doesn’t work out, there’s always the harness or the net to catch me.”  or “What if there’s no connection when I let go?”  (Apparently these thoughts are absolutely normal – normal feelings about an “abnormal” choice to fling all that you are into the wide open air, with little less than rope, a bar, and two hands on the other side waiting to catch you.)

Once you decide to go, you have to tell the release person “Go!” and they release their hold on you as you take your first big swing on the trapeze and then flip yourself up to sit on the bar.  I remember my first time on that platform – I was not afraid of the climb, I was not afraid of the size or the height of the platform, and I was not even afraid of the upcoming catch…but the word “Go!” took its sweet time coming out of my mouth.   I felt I was waiting for a moment to feel secure enough to be all in and release.  I knew it would come.

I finally did say “Go!”, taking a big swing down, hanging from the bar, flipping myself to sitting position and then holding the swing with a kung fu grip.  I DID IT!!  I DID IT!!  I’m swinging!! The feel of the breeze on my body, the pure smell of the air at that height, the Atlantic ocean vistas laid out before me, the joy of having let go and trusted.

Then there was connecting to the other person on the opposite swing, another step of faith – I mean, what if our hands didn’t connect?  what if our hands got sweaty and I fell?  what if I couldn’t find the my swing in the return?  As I turned to position myself to connect, I succeeded in reaching out my hands and locking grips with my trapeze partner, letting go of my swing, relying on the strength of another.

Deciding to become a missionary is like trapezing with the Lord.  There was quite a climb (wrestling with the idea and submitting) …there was a moment of securing myself to a harness (ADRN)…there was a moment of doubt (Am I sure this is the way?)…there is the moment of release (sending out the donation requests)…there is the joy mixed with the kung fu grip of the first full swing (giving in to the thrill of following Christ but clinging to His hand)…there is the fear of not connecting (will others partner with me?)…there is the list of questions (what about bills? insurance? retirement?)…there is the thrill of realizing you are actually doing it (receiving the first payments, working for the Lord)…and then there is the realization of the absolute freedom of a life in Christ, a life with a singular focus of gazing upon His beauty and inquiring in His temple.

Ah the sweetness of trapezing with the Lord! Flying high on eagle’s wings!  Release!


What exactly is a Fire Pearl?

What exactly is a Fire Pearl?



“…and He pulled out a large, rimmed abalone bowl…”


Well, it all started while I was walking in the Spirit.  During a time of deep listening to the Lord, I inquired of the Lord how He saw me.  Immediately I was sitting atop a snowy peak with Jesus looking out on many other snowy peaks surrounded by clouds – it was beautiful and peaceful.  I looked at Him and asked Him how He saw me.  Before I knew it, we were in the Throne room, and He pulled out a large, rimmed abalone bowl, and in the bowl were many pearls of all colors, sizes, and lustre – one pink, one black, one white, one yellow, and then I see Him reaching toward one that was truly like a fire opal, and He confirms that this one is me.

This is the closest I’ve found so far, but pales in comparison to the pearl in the bowl. “For now we see in a mirror, dimly…” (1Corinthians 13:12)

Just as His fingers picked up the “fire” pearl, it transformed from a solid to a starburst of brilliant multi-colored light that shone so brightly that it nearly blinded me.  My jaw dropped in amazement – “Lord, are you sure You have the right one?”  I found it hard to believe myself as this brilliant starburst of light that reached far and wide and filled every space.  The Lord replied, “As a pearl, you are beautiful to Me, but the moment you allow Me to pick you up, My Light fills you and you are much more.”

As I came back to my surroundings with my jaw still open in disbelief, I realized that in taking this step forward as a missionary, I am allowing His Light to fill me up and “greater works than these” I will do – truly my faith is being stretched and tested at just the thought of what He showed me, let alone doing.  I thank the Lord for granting me this vision; I treasure it!  I thank the Lord for increasing my faith and my capacity to keep my eyes on Him.

On 04/17/17, a dear friend Sue blessed me with a beautiful abalone shell in connection to my season, Fire Pearl Missions – thank you so much dear Friend!  Blessings to you and yours, Sue!

Prayer to fuel the Mission

Prayer to fuel the Mission

Of all the people in high school likely to become a missionary, I was probably at the bottom of the list.  In fact, I wasn’t even born-again then.  I’m not really even sure I knew what missionaries did.

Fast forward to today, and the picture is a miraculous transformation!  Not only did the Lord save me and accelerate my spiritual growth, but He put a call on my life to help those in crisis through both my church, Glad Tidings of Austin (GT Austin), and Austin Disaster Relief Network (ADRN). Even more recently in 2016, He called me to step out in faith and become a missionary.

My stereotypes and deceptions about missionary fundraising had to be addressed first, so the Lord has led me on a humbling journey for the large part of a year, and finally, He has indicated that NOW is the time to start my campaign.  My intention is to be full-time at ADRN by January 1st, which doesn’t leave much time to pull in funds, but I’m following the Lord’s lead on this, and if He is for me, who can be against me?  Amen!

So, what’s going to fuel this campaign?  PRAYER!  I cannot do what I’m about to do without 1) the call of the Lord to go before me and lay out the path He has for me, and 2) an abundance of thanksgiving, praise, and prayer.  I am so thankful to each one of you for coming around me as prayer warriors, intercessors for my missionary journey